Maybe i'll write a little something to pass the time

the hours drag on without care about the fucking crimes

i might commit if i listen to my heart....tonight

The inconsistancy of emotion drives me crazy

i would go kill someone....i'm just too lazy

I wish i had someone who i could tell...

all the things i feel and all i lies i held...

in me...

Happy: I drown in my thoughts...reminisce about my past

with him by my side, w/o a care in my soul...free

Angry: too young to stop things...too old to act innocent...

to stupid to change things...too smart to ignore...

Lost: searching for a place to call a home...

searching for someone to hold me when i'm cold...

searching for someone who understands...how i feel....right now.

Scared: fearing the things that might happen next...afraid i might mess up

mess up this already fucking huge mess...what happens if i fall..what
happens if..

i make the wrong turn and end up somewhere i dread...

Cold: a chill running down my spine, my eyes bleeding ice cold tears,

my heart being stabbed by a thousand razor blades...all at once,

i frozen hand gripping my throat...

Hoping: maybe...out there in that void...i'll find someone who can help
me.

someone who can sit down w/ me and tell me that all i did was in

vain...i'm ok...

Disturbed: seeing someone...then they disappear...dream dreams of fear and

dreams where..

i can touch him before he disappears again.

Vulnerable: every time i turn a corner..someone's there waiting for
me...tell me

that they know

tell me that they can help...then they raise the knife above me and wait to


plunge...

Losing my trust....before i can ever even start...

Faking: smiling to everyone saying i'm just fine...though inside a fire
burns...

burns through to my head till i can't even hide it anymore...

A perfect child is what they see...but inside i'm as tarnished as a
broken

antique..

Thrown Out: kicked out of society...losing control of my head and everything


else...

i wish this world just ignores me instead they kick me out..

say i'm just another wanderer...just like the rest...no different...

Homicidal: i'll paint this city red with everyones blood...i will
remain the only

one

there i'll sit and be one with myself...no one can tell me what to do
then...what

to think

not anymore...i will be my own self...i will be at peace...just about..

Serene: cold...gentle...floating above the world on my own rainy cloud..

a white seraph with a clouded mind...the sky will open up and swallow me

whole

and there i'll be in a void...a lost soul wearing the mask of an
angel...

So here i am holding onto these useless emotions...

here i am holding onto something...i don't know what...

This is my little list of how i feel right now...

U might not be able to tell the lies from the truths...but know this..

know that this is how i feel...how i will feel forever...

Until that day comes...and someone will find me...and show me

....

....

...

...

a meaning to this pitiful life...

 
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