as I lay awake at night, horrid thoughts and images I try to fight. why do I
lose im not quite sure, hoping and praying I am for a cure. its like the
skies falling on me, I guess I must pay the fee. the whole world hates me I
know its true, my mom my dad and even you. why is the world so harsh no one
really knows, I guess this is just the road I chose.


and as I lay awake once more, shadows creeping at my door. I want to fly
into the deep blue, it’s a nice thought,yes its true. if only I could fly
away and maybe just start new, I would never again have to bother you.


again and again I lay awake staring at my ceiling, hoping no one else feels
this terrible pain I am feeling. the rain keeps beating down but just on me,
the source of this monster I can not see. the monster comes day after day,
all he wants is to make me pay. the trees they whip the winds they howl,
they must think im mean and fowl. destiny has it in for me ,fate it really
hates me, luck isn’t on my side how good your life must be.


lying here I feel so cold, you are useless and a waste is what im told. as
the wind keeps howling louder, you stink you suck is yelled by the shouter.
as I toss and turn in bed, I remember all that the monster said. he tells me
im a waste of air and im not actually needed, like a garden full of grass I
really must be weeded. he said that im unwanted here, and that I should just
disappear.


lying here im not quiet sure, is my heart really pure. I want to see the
world around me, but fear and hate all surround me. like a turtle in its
shell, im scared of life cant you tell. I go in my room to hide away, but
that is where the monster is every day. waiting for me to come to it, and
fall into its evil pit. the monster makes my life not worth living, but I
thought I was kind and giving.


one last time I lay awake just trying to go to bed, your unloved and hated
that’s what the monster said. now im flying in the sky, flying higher and
higher am I. now that the end is hear, I shall shed just one tear.

 
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